ABCs with Bloom

I’ve been hesitant to post more online ever since the pandemic. I’m not sure why, but I just stopped sharing my life as much as I used to. Recently, I decided to post more and show up online, including on Instagram where I've been pretty dark for the last two years.

I posted a photo of me at my cousin's wedding and I received this message in my DM's.

She was being 100% genuine and kind but reading that knocked me off my feet!

I immediately got self-conscious and like hot and sweaty. I told my husband because I didn't want to process this one by myself.

Then he reminded me that just yesterday I had been sharing the ABC model to teens when we are confronted with things like this, whether intentional or not.

A - activating event - objective situation
B - belief system - thoughts that come shortly after
C - consequential emotion - feelings

then... we can:

D - dispute - ask ourselves what we believe
E - effective belief - replace with a new belief

I am so thankful for this framework to help me process through my beliefs and thoughts! I didn’t sit in this for too long and continued on the things I love to do which right now include: going on long walks and reading. One of the first thoughts I had was: I am NOT showing up online anymore. But now I feel more equipped to share, like I am doing here! If you're like me and feeling a little scared to post and show up online, so am I. But I do want to share and hope that we can move past whatever may discourage us from doing so!

Just a note, if reading this has brought up any negative or painful memories of unintentionally hurting someone with your words, feel free to use these tools as well knowing none of us are perfect and we absolutely deserve grace and can grow!

With love,

Andi